Do you ever...

Feel like everyone around you is living a valuable, eventful, exciting, remarkable, memorable life, and in your case, you're merely existing.

Everyone around you is moving a million miles a minute. Life is moving forward for everyone else, and you're there standing still watching the world pass you by.

That may sound incredibly depressing but that thought crossed my mind today. Often I feel like I'm just 'here'. Am I making an impact on anyone's life. Is my simple existence in my everyday, non eventful life significant? There are numerous days where I go to work, come home and that's what my day looks like. I'm sad to say that I don't have many friends here, which can really make life lonely, and difficult.

I question my decision to move here frequently. Am I happy, was it the right choice? Without a doubt I was brought here for a reason, but what IS that reason? What is my purpose here, am I fulfilling it? These are questions I ask myself on a daily basis. Am I supposed to be in a time of self reflection and growth? Is this a time in my life where I'm meant simply to just 'be'?

What am I doing with my life. I suppose rather than just going to work and coming home I have a lot of reflection time. Maybe I'm supposed to be spending time with God figuring out who I am, what my heart is like, where I'm headed career wise. I honestly don't know. And after feeling like I've been in this 'season' for 2 years. Frankly I'm ready for it to pass.

I'm tired of feeling like I merely exist. I want a meaningful, remarkable, valuable, exciting life. So, now I suppose I must ask...what do I need to do to get myself there.