My, how things change!

It's been over a year since I've posted anything on here which doesn't surprise me, it's been a rather interesting year. A lot of highs along with some inevitable lows. A relationship, a break up. Starting school and pursuing my dream in a little nowhere town. All a part of the journey, hard and frustrating times and times of celebration and accomplishment.

I've been reading Donald Miller's new book, and have been sucked into the story about stories. I want to write more about it but it's nearly 2:30 am and I have a long day ahead of myself. So this is a to be continued post. I had forgotten the address of my blog it had been so long, but I do want to share some thoughts about this book. And also about some movies I've seen lately.

For now though...it's off to bed for me. I don't even know if anyone ever reads this. It's like sending thoughts out into space, hoping someone will stumble across this measly blog and find some inspiration in these words.

Good night.

Movies

I LOVE movies, I always have and always will. I went to see The Secret Life of Bees last night. After reading the book and hearing there was going to be a movie made from it, I had to see it. I'm glad to say that I was not disappointed. I thought the movie was very true to the book, and stayed with the story line and most of the time the book is better than the movie but in this case I think the movie was just as good. Other than Alicia Key's bad acting I enjoyed it a lot. Here's a sneak peek....




There was a preview for the move called 'Boy in the Striped Pajamas' it's during the time of the Holocaust. It's about a boy in a concentration camp and a boy that discovers him that is the same age, who's father is a German soldier. I've always been fascinated with this time in history, not because I think it was 'cool' but there's SO much for us to learn as human beings from this time. There are so many amazing stories that have come from this time about struggle, faith, the fight to get through everyday. I can't wait to see this movie.

iCare

'For you were called to freedom, brethren; only do not turn your freedom into an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another.' Galatians 5:13

Yesterday at church, we started a new series called 'iCare'. Challenging the church to go from the person who says, I ought to do something to I'm going to do something. It was a sermon that truly challenged me and made me want to go out and do something for someone in need. At the end of the service, there were baskets passed out to the congregation and they either had a $5, 10 or 20 dollar bill in them. This money had been set aside by the church for missions and they divided it up and handed it out to challenge us to go out and blitz our community with service and love.

I couldn't wait to get my envelope open, I kept saying that I hoped it would be a 20, so I could do more. I've decided to double it and add money of my own so I really can do something for someone.

Yesterday we went out to lunch after church as usual. At the end of our meal, our waitress put down our check and then walked over next to me and put another check down. I looked at it and it was for $17 I looked around to see who's ticket it was and finally discovered it was the couple's who were sitting behind me. I turned around and gave it to them and then stopped and thought, maybe I was supposed to pay for their lunch and told God I was sorry for missing the opportunity. Then as we were pulling out of the parking lot, there was a man with a sign that said 'Homeless, anything would help' So I told Tracy we couldn't just pass him up. We just heard a sermon about doing something when we see a person in need. We both grabbed our wallets and pulled out some money by the time we did so, he was so far gone and the light was green. Hopefully God saw our willingness.

Anyways...I have this $20 sitting on my desk in an envelope waiting to be used. The hardest part is deciding how to use it. I've been thinking of making a nice meal and taking it over to a local fire station. Or buying a family groceries who is in need. I just don't know but I can't wait. I suppose prayer and listening would be a good way to start.

I challenge you to show people around you that you care even if it's a note telling them that they are appreciated or buying your friend or coworker lunch.

Do you ever...

Feel like everyone around you is living a valuable, eventful, exciting, remarkable, memorable life, and in your case, you're merely existing.

Everyone around you is moving a million miles a minute. Life is moving forward for everyone else, and you're there standing still watching the world pass you by.

That may sound incredibly depressing but that thought crossed my mind today. Often I feel like I'm just 'here'. Am I making an impact on anyone's life. Is my simple existence in my everyday, non eventful life significant? There are numerous days where I go to work, come home and that's what my day looks like. I'm sad to say that I don't have many friends here, which can really make life lonely, and difficult.

I question my decision to move here frequently. Am I happy, was it the right choice? Without a doubt I was brought here for a reason, but what IS that reason? What is my purpose here, am I fulfilling it? These are questions I ask myself on a daily basis. Am I supposed to be in a time of self reflection and growth? Is this a time in my life where I'm meant simply to just 'be'?

What am I doing with my life. I suppose rather than just going to work and coming home I have a lot of reflection time. Maybe I'm supposed to be spending time with God figuring out who I am, what my heart is like, where I'm headed career wise. I honestly don't know. And after feeling like I've been in this 'season' for 2 years. Frankly I'm ready for it to pass.

I'm tired of feeling like I merely exist. I want a meaningful, remarkable, valuable, exciting life. So, now I suppose I must ask...what do I need to do to get myself there.

It's been a while

So, back to blogging. I just took an unintended hiatus from blogging. I'm back now and hopefully will have reason to blog. Life has been rather uneventful the past few months. I'm living in a new place, with a new job, apartment and so on. I've been able to spend time with my family which is always enjoyable. Work is going well, crazy but good for the most part. Granted I work with 3 and 4 year olds so sometimes I feel like running in the opposite direction. My co-teacher's husband had open heart surgery last week so I'm not even sure if she's coming back. Work is extremely tiring right now but I'm hoping it will only improve. I've been living in a pretty sweet apartment since the end of July, it's in a good location and is a pretty quiet place to live even though there are about 15 buildings. I found a church...FINALLY. After two years of living here and sometimes feeling like giving up on a search, I've found one. The best part is, my sister in law and nieces are coming with me. It's the best to be able to have them there with me and see my nieces enjoying going to church (even though sometimes the like to pretend that they don't). Well...hopefully I'll be able to update this sooner than later. I'm headed to another race this weekend, so I'm looking forward to that. I'm off for now.

My first goodbye in Raleigh

There's a sweet, sweet girl that I babysit every other weekend. Her name is Kensleigh, and tonight was my last time babysitting her. It was sad driving away from their home knowing I wouldn't see them again in two weeks. I realize that there are people here that I've become attached to and the Layne family are some of them. Such sweet, funny people with the most darling little girl. It's nice to know that I have people to visit here and that look forward to seeing me again. I think it's finally hit me that yes I'm excited about this change but I will miss people here and I am a bit sad. I'll miss my little Kenie girl.

Short hair rocks my life!

I got my hair cut last Saturday and I LOVE it! Finally an awesome haircut! I'm sure you all remember how traumatized I was after my last haircut. Thankfully Kayla's friend rocked it out and I have a sweet short do. I already made an appt for June...that's right folks I'm coming back to Raleigh to get my hair cut lol! Anyways...I made an attempt @ taking pictures of the back and sides of my head the other day...so here's an idea of what it looks like! :)